Fox Mocks Old Lady, 102-year-old waits to vote

Yeah, that’s right. Fox News mocked this sweet 102 year old lady’s long wait to cast her ballot at the elections.

Desiline Victor

Can you believe it? She had to wait in line, then go home, and come back and wait again. That’s perseverance. You think that’s easy for a young healthy person? It was reported that in Florida alone, 201,000 eligible voters went home after waiting in the long lines without casting their ballot. This woman, Desiline Victor, kept at it. We should applaud her.

Here’s what Fox News decided to say:

Martha MacCallum said: “What’s the big deal?” and “This is such a non-issue. Ridiculous.”

Classy. As I have always said, Fox News, you are a class act.

The big deal is that President Obama invited her to the State of the Union address, and then applauded her efforts. Have you, Martha, been invited by the President of the United States of America and applauded? No, and I don’t think you will ever be, especially for making fun of the elderly, and people who are determined to do their civic duty.

 

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Maine and Maryland Come Out!

More cool-ass news, guys! Maine and Maryland have come out! By popular vote, no less. The public majority of both states recently (like, three days ago) voted to have Marriage Equality.

Dude, that’s fucking cool.

Tolerance and Acceptance strikes again!

I’ll have to add Maine and Maryland to my Marriage Equality States song (stolen from Jesse Tyler Ferguson’s Tie the Knot organization. Don’t know about it? Like bow ties? Click herehttp://www.tietheknot.org/) Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts  New Hampshire, New York, Vermont… Washington D.C., and now Maine and Maryland. Now, just imagine that, but in song.

A Marriage Equality Act is also expected to pass in Washington, too. And an anti- same sex marriage proposal in Minnesota is expected to fail. The gays are taking America by storm! Soon we’ll all be fabulous, and there ain’t nothing wrong with that.

Tammy’s Victory! The First Openly Gay Senator

In case you haven’t heard, Tammy Baldwin, a woman from Wisconsin, has been elected to the Senate! Not only that, she’s openly gay. The first in history, I’m told. (Not the first openly gay person ever, the first elected to the Senate. Just so we’re clear. I know, sometimes I mix those two up too.)

Now, I can’t say I know much about her politics. She’s liberal democrat. And she’s for Medicare and Medicaid, in case you were wondering. I myself always find my mind wandering on such issues. And it’s great she’s been elected. She may turn out to be a crappy politician, but I hope she won’t be. Just because she’s gay and a woman doesn’t instantly make her perfect. But it’s great she’s been elected.
(I didn’t like Tommy Thompson’s politics. He was a sell-out and a corporate stooge. Too many special interests for my taste. What can I say, he just wasn’t working anymore. No, I don’t live in Wisconsin. Why do you ask?)

The polls show that Tammy was elected mostly by women and people under 30, which is cool for a couple reasons.
1. Women’s voices are being heard. They’re coming to be a regular force of nature, something to be reckoned with, and that’s really bitchin’.
and 2. The younger populations are showing up more and more in the poles. We’re breeding ourselves a new generation of more politically-aware and open-minded people. It shows that people are showing more tolerance and acceptance for difference. And that’s always good. That’s a brighter future, a damn good hope for achieving World Peace right there.

And the last really cool thing about Tammy being elected is now that there’s an openly gay person in the Senate, it’s bound to raise more gay issues. Once a person is sitting in the room, it makes a big difference. People will become more aware. Hopefully, what we’ve done is started a tiny pebble down the side of a mountain. And that pebble will bump into a few more pebbles, and those will knock into some slightly bigger rocks, and pretty soon we’ll have a boulder running down the face of the cliff. And I mean this in the best, non-violent way possible. We’ve started a powerful avalanche… of sweet potatoes and Cool Ranch Doritos. That’s not violent, and yet strikingly mighty and awe-inspiring, right? Ah, screw the metaphor. You know what I mean.

Anyways, in Tammy’s own words: “You’re damn right we’re making a difference!

Hurricane Sandy: God’s Punishment for Homosexuals

Christian religious leader John McTernan has already claimed that Hurricane Sandy is proof that “God is systematically destroying America” as political judgement on America’s “homosexual agenda”. (You know, because only America has gays. Or perhaps God only hates American gays?) But Hurricane Sandy isn’t the only homophobic storm. He claims Hurricanes Katrina and Isaac are as well.

His proof? Hurricane Isaac hit exactly seven years after Katrina, both hitting during the week of Southern Decadence in New Orleans (a gay event). But not only that, Hurricane Sandy is hitting 21 years after the “Perfect Storm,” because 21 breaks down into 7 and 3, both “perfect” numbers when relating to God (for some reason? And then when you multiply them together it makes 21 even more perfect? Don’t worry, you’re not the only lost one here.)

This isn’t the first time religious spokespeople have connected natural disasters with the LGBT community. Pat Robertson, a TV preacher, has long believed that tolerance and acceptance of gays would result in hurricanes, earthquakes, tornadoes, terrorist bombs (really?), and “possibly a meteor.”

And I think he’s right. After all, it is a well-known fact that the meteor hit Earth during the annual T-Rex Gay Parade, and Mount
Vesuvius exploded because the Pompeiians were having an Allies Training session. Dude, this all makes sense now! Global Warming is in on it too. It’s the Earth heating up, like how a human body has a fever to kill a cold, to kill off all the infecting gays!

Doesn’t this all sound a little… Oh, what’s the word I’m looking for…. It’s not pagan, because there’s nothing wrong with that… It’s not witchery, because I wouldn’t want to insult the Sanderson Sisters…. Oh, that’s right: crazy. All of this just sounds way too crazy. I got nothing against religion, but this is too much like the Salem witch hunts, or Noah flooding the world. And god forbid we bring any actual science, like say meteorology, into this.

It’s definitely God, and definitely the homosexual agenda–due to Obama being pro-gay and everything. Because God never misses an election day.

But what an evil thing to say, especially since a lot of good people are getting hurt during this storm, gay and straight, men and women, black, orange, gray, and white people. People are struggling for their livelihoods and homes, friends and families, and this Yahoo McTernan thinks God did it to punish a select few in a wide range of people. If He were going to attack a place, why wouldn’t he attack Salt Lake City, the gayest city in the U.S.! (Yes, it’s true. More gays than Chicago, LA, or New York.) And prior hub to Governor Romney (because he doesn’t like Romney either). It seems so much more likely since Salt Lake is sitting on a fault line and everything. It wouldn’t take very much to start a damn good earthquake. But no, clearly hurricane is the way to go.

Binders Full of Women for Everyone!

To those who don’t know what Romney said during the presidential debate, here is the video with his exact words just for you. It’s only two and a half minutes long: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OX_AN4w3da8

When the woman asked what the president was going to do about inequality in the workplace, the continuing problem of Equal Pay for Equal Work, Obama gave a pretty decent answer in my opinion. Romney, however, well… we all know how that went down.

Problem number one: he didn’t answer the question. He used the entire time allotted to talk about how he was such a great guy and went around collecting binders full of women candidates for the job opening when he didn’t have to, when it was inconvenient for him. 

Thank you, Romney. You’re such a saint.

I completely support recognizing the gap between the sexes during promotion and hiring time. And if every business man was a gender-conscious as Romney claims himself to be, then people and businesses across America would profit greatly.

But the words he used made it sound as if he was single-handedly responsible for giving all these women the chance of their life. Oh, how socially-aware he is. How kind. How elevated.

The problem with Romney’s plan to increase equality in the workplace is that he has no plan. No plan at all. Romney’s exact words are:

“We’re going to have to have employers in the new economy, in the economy I’m going to bring into play, that are going to be so anxious to get good workers they’re going to be anxious to hire women.”

He’s going to increase business, and the business owners will be so happy and so busy that they’ll just magically hire women? Really? Because that happens all the time, right? Maybe we should all have binders full of women to carry around and be enlightened.

What’s more, he generalized women workers to be working mothers. Women need flexible schedules because they have young children. Because they need to be there when they come home. Because their husband/partner obviously can’t take on the traditional mother role and cook dinner for the entire family and she needs to be there. 

And while a lot of women do need flexible hours because the traditional role of mother still falls onto women to be there when the kids get home and to cook dinner, even if Romney’s magical business plan to boost the economy works (which it probably won’t because he thinks trickle down economics are a good idea), even if businesses suddenly boom and grow and need new workers, there’s no plan in place to stop discrimination against women/mothers in the workplace. There’s no plan in place to enforce Equal Pay for Equal Work. There’s no fire under anyone’s butt to make employers allow flexible hours for mothers who do need to be home when the kids come home from school. 

Watch Out! You Don’t Fit into Society’s Rigid Gender Ideals and Therefore are about to be Crushed by an Ironic Symbol of Masculinity! she called only too late…

Here for you now, I present a collection of Milwaukee’s Best Light Beer commercials… Enjoy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGItoKaX0BM

What do all of those commercials have in common? Beer. And also hegemonic masculinity.

Hegemonic masculinity is the term used to explain the criteria for being a “real man”; a model for all men to show how they “should” be. Generally, in American culture, there is only one complete unblushing male: a young, married, white, urban, heterosexual, Protestant, father, college educated, fully employed, handsome, tall, of the appropriate weight, and has a recent record in sports. And anyone who fails to qualify in any one of these ways at any time is likely to see himself as unworthy, incomplete, or inferior. Right? All other men who don’t fit this criteria are not manly at all. 

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The tagline of the beer is “Men should act like men”, and those who do not act like “men” should be crushed to death by an enormous beer can that falls from the heavens. Of course.

Clearly, this is unfair and sexist towards men. The men deserve to die because they are not acting like men, but are acting like women, and men becoming women is a fate deserving of death?

However, these men are not acting “like women”. They’re just not being stereotypical, hammer-up-the-drywall, macho-macho-masculine dudes.

The man who was showing love, warmth, affection, and sensitivity to a dog instead of working on the car? He definitely needed to die.

The guy who checked in with his wife? Acknowledging that he cares about his relationship? Obviously worthy of death. How dare a man be considerate. That’s just not how we do things here.

The dude with the clothes matching his wife? Whipped! He lost control of his woman. (And if you notice, once the guys reject him, his wife does too. She lets go of his hand and kind of inches away from him. Rejected by everyone.)

The man blotting his pizza, caring about his health, and perhaps even his appearance? Dead. And good riddance. (This is ironic because most older men in America have worse health than their wives. Not to mention this is a Light Beer commercial.)

A lot of this idea of masculinity has to do with the time we live in. If you notice, all of the “real” men are doing manual labor: digging a hole, fixing a car, grilling outdoors…. A hundred years ago, the perfect man would be he who did not have to do any physical labor. He would have slaves or servants to do it for him. Today, that has completely changed. The men were smoking, eating, drinking, working, getting dirty. Their masculinity was about brute strength. And this doesn’t really seem all that odd to us, because it is in fact hegemonic, and we don’t realize it’s there. We’ve integrated it into society so thickly, so deeply, that it only seems natural to us. Of course guys are rough and sweaty. What else would they be?

However, if this idea of “masculinity” was in fact natural, a hundred years ago the manliest men would also be digging holes and greasing up the … horses. If this really was natural, there wouldn’t be such great differences across time and space.

Here in America, two guys holding hands—not cool. Guys don’t generally hold hands, not unless their lovers. But in Africa, across the sea in the Middle East, guys hold hands. It’s a sign of friendship, of comradery. Guys do it all the time there, and it’s normal, it’s natural.

A guy I know, we’ll call him Gerard, served a Mission down in Africa recently. He had a tour guide to help him navigate the town. The tour guide was going to show him where such-and-such was, so he reached down to grab Gerard’s hand and instantly Gerard snatched his hand back, absolutely shocked. His tour guide looked at him strange, he was kind of hurt and confused. The tour guide was just trying to show him the way. Why had he not wanted to hold hands with him? Weren’t they pals?

It was extremely weird for Gerard to hold another man’s hand, and it was weird for the tour guide not to because of these two conflicting ideas of masculinity.

What’s so wrong with two guys holding hands in America? Oh right, because it’s “gay”.  … Oh, sorry, that was my cue: *Gasp!*

But wait, now why is that a bad thing? Oh right, because of this thing called hegemonic masculinity that says all real men are straight men, and real men are hardass Schwarzenegger S.O.B.’s that would never show affection or emotion because truly they’re half robot inside. And any deviancy will be met with the swift and just verdict of a giant beer can falling out of the sky to murder them on the spot. Silly me, how could I forget?

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Whoopsi daisy! How did that get there?